By Dr. Eda F. Harris Hastick, NYC Chapter Board of Directors
(October 1996)

Writing about stress targeted to an audience of social workers is like preaching to the converted.

No matter where we live and work, we all know about stress and its consequences. We try to manage stress in our daily lives and most of our work with others involves helping them to manage their stress levels. But no matter how much we think we know about the subject matter from personal and professional experience, we still need to remind ourselves often about its personal consequences, especially in these challenging times when the profession is undergoing profound changes and all of us are trying to develop strategies to meet the challenges and still survive.

We need to keep in mind some truths about stress:

Stress in and of itself does not kill anyone or else we would all be dead. Rather, it is how we manage stress: Our responses and reaction to daily stressors can cause personal, physical, emotional, financial problems and yes, even death.

Troubled times can be opportunities for personal and professional growth, if specific strategies are applied to help manage the stressors of daily living.

We also know that limited amounts of stress can increase awareness and productivity, to keep us on our toes, so to speak. On the other hand, we have seen results of prolonged periods of stress on our clients and on ourselves. The very nature of our jobs as caregivers requires that we spend a good portion of our time dealing with other people's stressors. We know all to well the devastation and the desperate struggles for survival which many of our clients experience which often require our involvement as nurturer and guide.

So much of our time is spent tending to the needs of others and often ignoring our own emotional needs. We need to take greater responsibility for managing stress in our own lives. This will help us to feel less victimized and more empowered, no matter what is going on around us.

Caring Tips

Here are four tips for taking care of ourselves, while taking care of others.

1. Develop a plan which allows you to focus time and attention on yourself. For some of us this might be difficult because we are not used to thinking about ourselves and putting self first. Taking care of self allows us to be better able to take care of others . So no matter who you are-supervisor, administrator or first year social worker-you need to take time out to examine and assess your strengths and those areas in your life needing improvement. Sometimes we are our own worst enemies, taking on blame and wallowing in unwarranted guilt. So whenever possible, get a friend to assist in this effort so that you can be more objective in your assessment of who you really are, feel good about yourself and receive the credit (from you) that you really deserve.

2. Take a good look at how you handle relationships, i.e. worker-client relationships as well as personal and professional ones. Sometimes we are reluctant to say "no", taking on more than we should. Thus, we often have more on our plates than we can adequately manage. In the long run, it is far better to level with people so that they know what is realistic to expect and we can be more at peace with ourselves. Some relationships can be physically draining and emotionally demanding. In our roles as caregivers, we want to please others and often "carry" people who drain and distract us. Sometimes we take on too many responsibilities because we often feel that "if I don't do it, it won't get done." So we drive ourselves and then end up feeling driven. We need to re-examine how we work with clients and colleagues and consider whether or not we are taking on more than is appropriate. So, the next time you feel stressed in the relationship with a client, ask yourself "Am I helping this client to move toward feeling empowered or am I taking on more than is appropriate and doing more for than doing with?" Then take a look at how you are handling the supervisor-supervisee relationship. Are the lines of communication clear so as to facilitate discussion of problematic areas? Are we assuming full responsibility for professional involvement, or, are we expecting others to do for us what we should be doing for ourselves? Taking responsibility for self improvement also includes bringing enough positive relationships into our lives to nurture, encourage and enhance personal and professional growth through self-fulfillment.

3. Reserve time for yourself. The busier we become and the more challenged we feel, the more important it is to take time out for a movie, some physical exercise such as a walk, or a visit to the gym. There is a temptation when you become busy to settle into a work routine and isolate yourself from friends, colleagues and even family, avoiding opportunities for networking and relaxing moments. Re-evaluate how you use your time. Watch those distractions and time wasters which keep you pressed for time and stressed, with little or no time for you and the people in your life who offer nurture and support.

4. Finally, believe in a Higher Power no matter who or what that power may be. From a personal standpoint, I believe that the most important resource for all of us can be the belief in and use of a higher power that dwells within to guide, direct and assist through the good and the bad times. This belief allows us to go with the flow and not feel that we must be in control at all times. It can be helpful to begin each day by getting centered and focused on a power greater than ourselves, to help set the tone and the pace for the planned and the unplanned challenging activities of the day.

so, as you compute, e-mail and web surf your way into the 21st century, remember to stay centered and focused, keeping relationships with others in proper perspective. Most of all, take time out to develop a nurturing and supportive environment similar to the ones you try to create for your clients.